A bold little sermon delivered by… me, your crop top.

Hi babe.

Yeah, me — the crop top you’re about to add to cart.

I’m small, tight, sexy, shameless, and born to sit on your dangerous little torso like a crown. And today, I’m here to guide you through Level 2 of Being a Classy Hoe — the advanced syllabus.

Welcome back, slut scholar. Let’s begin.

1. First Rule: Own the Room Before You Even Enter

Listen babe, I’m literally stitched to serve drama. You walk in wearing me, and suddenly the room resets its Wi-Fi, heartbeats skip, gay boys gasp, girls whisper, uncles choke on their judgement, and the universe says:

“F*ck… who is THAT?”

That’s the power of a classy hoe.
You don’t shout. You don’t beg.
You just exist loudly.

And I’ll cling to your body like a certified accomplice.

2. Flaunt, But With Intention

A classy hoe doesn’t just show skin.
They show story.

A little shoulder?
A tease.

Your lower rib showing through me?
A confession.

A bold printed slogan across me like “Shameless. Fearless. F*cking Glorious”?
A manifesto.

Let people stare.
Let aunties combust.
Let strangers re-evaluate their sexuality.

You’re not exposing; you’re expressing.

3. Don’t Apologise for Being Hot, Loud, Queer, or Extra

Every time you wear me, here’s the energy:

“Yes, I’m hot.”
“No, I won’t tone it down.”
“Yes, this body is serving.”
“No, your judgement is irrelevant.”

A classy hoe is unbothered, polished, and chaotic in the most aesthetic way possible.

You stand there like a bisexual firecracker wrapped in polyester confidence, and the world can adjust.

4. Attention Is Not the Goal — It’s the Accessory

Everyone thinks hoes crave attention.
Wrong.

A classy hoe curates attention.

You choose when to shine, whom to tease, what to reveal, when to smirk, when to vanish.

I’m the little fabric weapon that enhances your stage presence—
not the reason you have it.

Your energy pulls people before your cleavage does.
(But still… the cleavage helps. You’re welcome.)

5. Mix Sexuality + Humour = Elite Hoe Behavior

Anyone can be hot.
Only a classy hoe can be hot and funny.

Example behaviours:

Winking at someone just to confuse them.
Wearing me with a print that says “Main Character Energy” while stealing everyone’s spotlight.
Standing in a club looking like bisexual chaos but laughing like an angel who knows too much.

Sexy + witty = dangerous.
And you? Baby, you’re a public safety hazard.

6. Your Wardrobe Must Speak Queer, Bold & Expensive-Smug

This is where I shine hardest.

You want the advanced hoe energy?
Your clothes must say:

“I have taste.”
“I have drama.”
“I also have zero shame.”
“And yes, I f*cking sparkle.”

Me — your BesharmiOnTop crop top — am literally designed for this.

I’m soft enough to be touched.
Bold enough to be noticed.
Cheap enough to buy on impulse.
Classy enough to look like you planned it.

7. Being a Classy Hoe Means Being Unshakeably Queer-Positive

I don’t care if you identify as gay, bi, trans, enby, or “I haven’t figured it out but I love crop tops.”

You wear me — you’re family.
I sit on your chest with pride.
You move through the world like the queer deity you are.

And in case someone stares with a judgmental face…

Just smile.

A classy hoe never fights.
She outshines.

8. The Final Rule: Always Leave Them Wanting More

Not everything needs to be shown.
Not every fantasy needs to be fulfilled.
Not every gaze needs to be acknowledged.

Mystery is the most erotic currency.

I cover just enough.
You reveal just enough.
Together we create a scandal wrapped in sophistication.

That’s advanced-level hoe energy.

So… Ready for Graduation?

If you’re prepared to level up from “cute hoe” to “elite, classy, queer-certified harbinger of thirst”, then baby…

Come buy me.
Come wear me.
Come let me turn your body into public art.

Shop at BesharmiOnTop.shop
Where outfits don’t just cover you — they corrupt you beautifully.

How to Be a Classy Hoe (Advanced Level)